March 17, 2014

Ripples and Waves


It all started in the wee hours of this morning as I was getting into the covers to fall asleep for the night. It was a bit after midnight and I remembered that I hadn't looked at my phone since the afternoon. This is really rare for me.

But, as a habit, I checked my phone. Why? Because, it's my lifeline to my loved ones all over the world... You never know when someone's going to need you to send some love their way.


When I read the first message, I sighed. My 92-year-old Uncle Ernest had passed away. He was the brother to my great-grandmother and the last living sibling of that generation. I felt a ripple of sadness that quickly turned into a ripple of delight. Because, the last time I saw my uncle was a few years ago when we were partying into the night in Savannah, Georgia. We were all there for a family reunion and we had so much fun. Uncle partied SO hard that night and let's just say he didn't care that he was 87, he partied just like the rest of us...

I clicked through a couple more messages and gasped. My cousin Mercy had passed away too!! She'd been ill and battling cancer. She's the daughter of my grand-mother's sister. The ripples of sadness came back and began to run a bit deeper and faster. Remembering my Nanny is sometimes hard for me because she went before I was ready to let her go...


I then remembered Mercy and her great smile and how much she reminded me of my Nanny when I saw her. The ripples of sadness subsided, until later today. I was shocked as I began to write a tribute to Mercy, when waves and waves of emotions and tears began to flow through me. I was shocked as floods of memories began to fill my mind. Memories of being with my loved ones who've passed and now are all together in Heaven. It felt debilitating for a few moments and then I breathed into it and let it come.

I let the tears come from my eyes and the smiles come to my lips.

The truth is, I'm blessed. I'm blessed to have such a LARGE family. When I married my husband, my large family tripled and I love it.  I can not even explain how deep and wide my roots are. It feels like an impossible task really. But, what I can say is, I'm connected and I'm grateful. With those connections come joy and sometimes sorrow; and that's totally ok.

The ripples and waves mean I'm alive and I love and am loved...

10 comments:

  1. I am so sorry for your loses, but, as always, I rejoice in lives well lived and loved ones well loved. Hugs to you!

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  2. What a beautiful post, Gerri. It brought tears to my eyes. Amidst a time of sadness, you found something more. You remembered the ones you've lost and appreciated them. You allowed yourself the to cry and let the grief out and you appreciated your large family and all the love from them.

    I really enjoy how you can take difficult dark times and find the light inside. That's a gift you share with us.

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    1. Thank you so much Sara. The light is what gets us through...xxO

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  3. i'm sorry for your loss, gerri, but what a wonderful tribute here.

    to the ripples, to the waves, to the love in all its forms...

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    1. Yes indeed... Thanks my friend. xxO

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  4. truly you are loved, G. You freely give that love right back, too:) I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing your memories of your loved ones with us.

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